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Mum time with friends


So as many of you would be aware I am a big one for encouraging 'Mum time' or 'time outs' I feel that we put so much pressure on us to be these perfect specimens of the human race and we focus on our children's needs above and beyond our needs and we don't do this enough. I think that if I had a spa bath or a bath I would spend a considerable amount of time soaking my stresses away or if I had the pre mortgage pre kids money I would be still doing my every 5 weeks facials and my hair would look like I could actually be fucked. 

When I grew up my mum looked after us and working on the farm, she had 4 kids and had my grandmother helping her considerably, also my sister was slightly older so she helped out lots as well, plus Dad but he always had lots of farm work that needed to be done. Back then people had a real community behind them, friends and grandparents were trusted more to help with the kids, we weren't being helicopter parents, we knew that our parents had brought us up so they were perfectly capable of looking after our kids and kids were not number one, having a balanced life was number one, work and play were equal components. 

So every year my school friends and I go on a wee break, we pick a place, somewhere in this great country and we go there. We drink, we relax, we pamper, we play knucklebones (yes very random) and we laugh, we talk about shit, we eat, we drink, shop, we walk and we drink some more. This relationship with this group of friends is easy, I will admit I'm pretty shit (and that's with a lot of my friends but this year I intend to work on this) I might not contact them for a good 6-12 months but the conversation just flows on like we haven't left and to me those are the best friendships, it's not a chore, it's easy and it's funny and fun. Most of my good friendships are like that and the friends I have in my life I know for a fact would and do have my back if needed just the same as I do for them. 

I'm more of a friend person, I love having great friends, my partner on the other hand has a very close family, they do everything together and that for me was really hard to get used to, the family knows everyone's stuff which is great for them, but I'm more of a you can choose your mates but not your family type of girl and my immediate family are close but nothing on that level. 

So the kids are loving hanging out with their nana and grandad, Dixie is in hanging with her south island cousins and in total hyper land, Takiari is stuck to grandad because he's a man's man. 

I'm relaxed and happy, maybe slightly hungover but I know I will be a nicer more present mum when I see the little punks again so please do something for you, no matter how big or small it is just do it, no matter how hard it is to leave them for an hour or a few days your kids will thank you for it.

Friendships and being happy shouldn't be hard work it should be the easiest thing in the world. 

Wanaka is still beautiful by BTW


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